Approval from others
Last week, I spoke with many mums in the school yard where their child especially their daughters were being told what to do by other kids through text messages. The implication was if they didn't, things would not work out for them. Bullying. No other word can describe that behaviour.
Adults and parents in many situations are just as bad. It is a lot more subtle. Not being invited to a social gathering. Excluding people out from certain conversations. Spreading rumours about people. Bullying as well.
As its National Day of Action against bullying and violence today, here are my thoughts on taking a stand against bullying:
1. Kids want to belong. It they are looking for approval from others, have conversations with them that they are better off being surrounded by friends who love and support them.
2. True friends aren't just there for the good times. Real friends are there for you through the tough times too
3. Whoever you please, there will always be someone who you can't please. Looking for approval from everyone will always lead to you not feeling 'good enough'
4. For parents this is hard as you may be friends with the other child's parents - put your child first
5. Keep repeating the affirmation to your child - 'you are amazing and loved and safe'
For more information on National Day of Action against bullying and violence, see the site. Click here.
If you are a bystander and support other people bullying others, then you are an indirect bully too. Take a stand. Grow a backbone. Let others know it is not OK to treat others like that. When we take a stand, the bully (adult or child) knows they will be questioned for their behaviour.